With summer just around the corner, store windows, magazines, and commercials keep reminding us that “bikini season” is upon us. Although there is undeniable pressure for women to look perfect year-round, summer can be especially hard on us and our body image. We find ourselves trying on bathing suits and leaving the dressing room discouraged, feeling the need to lose another 10 pounds or go on a new diet. From a young age, we’re taught by society to look for our flaws and imperfections instead of our natural beauty when we look in the mirror. We’re taught to critique and tear down our own self-esteem instead of build ourselves up. And nothing about that is beautiful.
When talking about positive body image, I usually always think of the iconic chick-flick Mean Girls and the scene where Regina, Gretchen, and Karen have to teach Cady how to find flaws in her appearance. “My pores are HUGE,” “I hate my calves,” and “I have man shoulders” are the negative comments the girls have to say about themselves, even though they are all obviously beautiful. Unfortunately, this scene is not as far removed from real life as it should be. Too often we’re taught to hate our bodies instead of love them, which ultimately results in seeing ourselves as “ugly.” The solution to overcoming this mindset is certainly not always easy, especially when we’ve grown up in a society that reinforces the practice. But just like you can learn to hate your body, you can always teach yourself how to love your body too. Here are 5 things I personally love doing to strengthen positive self-love in simple, every-day ways.
Photo Credits: Courtney Bailey
1. Write yourself love notes
In my sophomore year of a college, a group of students decided to go all over campus and post notes that said things like “you are so beautiful” and “you look gorgeous today” on all the mirrors in our bathrooms. You wouldn’t think those notes would be so impactful, but it was amazing just how much I would find myself smiling after reading them. I stood a little taller, I beamed a little brighter, and I felt happier the rest of the day. I decided to try doing the same thing in my own bathroom at home, and I still always get a boost of self-confidence in the mornings when I see “you look gorgeous” hanging over my mirror. Try to write yourself loving, reaffirming notes to remind yourself just how beautiful you really are and hang them in a place where you can read them every day.
2. Don’t weigh yourself for a while
Although there are some medical situations where it’s necessary to keep daily track of your weight, there is really no general need for weighing ourselves every morning or evening. In high school, I began regularly working out for the first time with the intention of living a healthier lifestyle. In the first few months, I would weigh myself after every workout, slowly becoming discouraged and obsessed with keeping a certain number on the scale. Of course, I didn’t think about water retention, muscle weight, etc. and I felt like I wasn’t working hard enough, which couldn’t have been farther from the truth. I had become so fixated on scale numbers that I forgot the whole reason I had begun regularly exercising in the first place: to be healthy and beautiful, inside and out. I was actually making a lot of progress and living a much healthier lifestyle, and it showed through in my complexion, mood, and overall body image. But I wasn’t able to fully enjoy this new-found healthy, beautiful lifestyle when I was constantly criticizing myself for not weighing a certain amount. I had to discipline myself to get off the scale for a while, only checking it every so often. Since then, I have found it much easier to embrace my body and love it with all its unique features. When numbers on a scale are no longer competing for your attention, you can more easily direct your thoughts towards viewing yourself through loving and confident eyes.
3. Pamper yourself
While telling yourself you’re beautiful and important is definitely a must, showing yourself appreciation and love is also extremely important. Whenever you take the time to treat yourself to a pedicure, have an at-home spa day, soak in a bubble bath, or get a relaxing massage, you’re sending yourself the positive message that you’re worthy of feeling beautiful because you are beautiful. No matter how busy my semester gets, I always make sure to treat myself to a candlelit lavender bubble bath at LEAST once a month (I usually need it once a week!). By giving myself just an hour one weekend night to use luxurious products I love and have “me-time,” I really have learned how to value myself. Pampering yourself teaches you that you are beautiful and deserve to be treated like you are. So don’t hesitate to buy yourself that expensive mud mask next time you’re in Ulta or try out that new DIY bath bomb recipe you found on Pinterest. You’re beautiful, and you deserve it!
4. Surround yourself with positive people
I seriously cannot stress enough just how important positive, encouraging friends are. If you hang out with people like Regina George who constantly criticize either you or themselves, you will notice yourself starting to pick up that nasty little habit too. Just like the saying “you are what you eat,” you are who you hang out with. Start listening to how your friends talk about themselves, you, and other girls, and if you ever hear negative comments about appearances, hair, clothes, etc., gently discourage these sort of conversations. Instead, you and your girlfriends have to practice building each other up. Genuinely compliment one another and think of beauty as being more than skin deep. If you notice your friends continuing this behavior after you’ve made attempts to stop it, the healthiest thing for your own body image and self-love is to walk away from their toxic influence. Surround yourself with people that build you up and teach you to build them up in return.
Photo Credits: Caitlin Bailey
5. Tell yourself you’re beautiful
While writing yourself notes, pampering yourself, and surrounding yourself with positive friends helps grow a beautiful self-love over time, the number-one thing you can do for positive body image is to simply tell yourself you’re beautiful. When you try on a swimsuit and are tempted to feel self-conscious, say aloud, “I love everything about my body. I’m beautiful.” When you wake up with a hormonal breakout or dark circles under your eyes from pulling an all-nighter, look in your vanity mirror and say, “I love everything about my body. I’m beautiful.” And when an insecure girl at school comments something negative on your Instagram photo or a boy rejects you because you weren’t “pretty enough,” take a selfie and caption it: “I love everything about my body. I’m beautiful.”
Naturally and Beautifully Me 